Diablo 3 .. meh

Welp. Playing Diablo 3 - or trying to - confirms that I am just not interested in games without pretties and lovely character development and cutscenes. Where are my blessed cutscenes?

I would blame Bioware for this, but truth is, this has always been my way since discovering Final Fantasy VII. I want to fall in love and hate with a story and characters, not just run around shooting things. 

Though, I admit, I did kind of like running around killing things with my Witch Doctor and all the wonderful things she summons from the darkness. Watching the Witch Doctor trailer almost tempts me to play in order to obtain the better spells.... Almost.

So, it would seem that this, like Skyrim, will remain over in my husband's corner of the Man Cave. I bought both those games specifically for him anyway, so no loss. 

The Stolen Throne

The Stolen Throne by David Gaider
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I’ve recently finished two playthroughs of Dragon Age: Origins and in both, my Warden permitted the same fate for Loghain Mac Tir. It was the fate deserving of his crime, but I never could appreciate the reasoning given for that crime as there seemed to be much more to Loghain. Hence my need to read the books that precede the game.

I had the same desire with Mass Effect’s books in reference to Saren and The Illusive Man, but was disappointed that Drew Karphsyn’s writing was not as spectacular as his ideas.

Despite my issues with David Gaider now, I was very pleased with this book. Gaider’s writing encompasses a lot of emotion, even in a character that seems limited to only a few. Barely 50 pages in, I already respected Loghain and even liked him, despite his harsh demeanor. Appreciation for King Maric was to be expected once it was established that he was much like his son, Alistair, in personality. But it was Loghain that I was interested in and the book did not let me down -- though it also means I am heartbroken over Loghain's ultimate fate.

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Warbreaker

Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The idea alone of using colour as a source of power made me very curious about this book. The details Sanderson puts into the use of colour and Breath is very intricate, yet surprisingly not overwhelming. The obvious religious comparisons are not overwhelming either. I was concerned for a moment when Austre, the one god, unseen, was introduced, but, despite the comparisons, the book wasn’t preachy, even as it admonished the hypocritical views of some of its characters. The other gods, the Returned, are a cross between a resurrected Jesus and the petty Greek gods – but with far less potency.

I loved that all the main characters started as one thing, but were thrown into situations that forced them to almost wipe their slates clean and grow into another. I’m a big fan of inconclusive endings, and I appreciated this one even more because it actually played off of the changes these characters went through, allowing you to assume the outcome.

The supporting cast of characters was very supportive, and served as distraction from all the plotting going on on all sides. Oh goodness, the plotting. I admit to skimming through some of these parts. I got the point without it needing to go on quite so much with the details.

The end felt a bit rushed and incomplete. Or rather, I accept that it was meant to be inconclusive and love inconclusive endings, but because it seemed to rush to that point in those last few pages, I felt a bit let down.

Overall, loved the book, loved the concepts presented. My favourite character would definitely have to be Denth, the mercenary happily complaining about how mercenaries are so unloved for obvious reasons...

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Dragon Age 2: Romance Guide

Thanks to a late night conversation with digitaltempest. This happened.

And then I put it on Tumblr.

The greatest trick the devil ever played, was convincing the world he was a feminist

Joss Whedon is not a feminist. Joss is, in fact, a brilliant and manipulative writer who knows his audience. Joss does not progressively cast strong female actresses in so-called strong female roles. Joss uses the power of the female - in all its forms - as an incredible plot device. There is nothing about what Joss does in his work that is not about advancing the plot and motivating characters. We know this of him killing favourite characters, but boy how he's fooled us into not realizing that this is the same thing he does with his strong female characters.  He's tricked the feminists into believing he is one of them. He's tricked the sexists into questioning their thinking.

The Avenger's Black Widow and her "skill sets" are the epitome of this trickery. The scene with Loki and Black Widow is a prime example, and before that, her scene with Bruce Banner. In both cases, she is called upon because of her "skill sets."   Let us not be naive. The assumption with that line is that her skill sets are based on her sex. Of course we know she's far more than that, especially if we've seen her in Iron Man 2 where she already proved herself to be more than a pretty face, but let's not be stupid enough to believe that an international spy and assassin does not use everything in her arsenal, as necessary, including her gender and the prejudices associated with it.

So does Joss.

Black Widow, Avengers

Those scenes were as much about her playing Loki and Banner as it was about Joss playing the audience. Because Joss takes our prejudices and hypocrisy and uses them against us.  Which is all well and good for plot development, but I'm tired of the "strong female character" and the "feminist" label when it comes to Joss. Joss is just a smart writer who knows how to play on our biases by writing interesting characters. I think he has a preference for female characters specifically because he can use these prejudices to bring more drama, but I don't think the majority of his characters can be considered "strong" in comparison to women from other films and TV shows, who are also interesting and flawed, but tend to overcome their flaws far better than Joss' women do.

River? Neglected by her parents, mindfucked and requires her brother for support. Buffy? Requires the support of her friends and boyfriends and remains a petulant, self-centred girl who isn't all that happy about the responsibilities thrust on her and often accepts escape from them, until guilt makes her return. Faith? Fucked up gal with daddy issues, currently seeking redemption through Angel. Cordelia? No clue what Joss did with her. Fred? Killed her just when she was coming into her own. Tara, Penny, Darla and Jenny? Refrigerated. Darla and Dru? Girlfriends. Harmony? lol. Willow? Continues to define herself by her skills and conforms to whomever she befriends. Echo? Selfish bitch who turned her back on a friend and sought to erase her past with the Dollhouse where she now is "strong" because of all the imprints - after she's beaten and fucked by all the men who rent her. Kaylee? Introduced on her back and fulfills the fantasies of men who like cars and a woman (with a childlike personality) who can fix them. Inara? A glorified prostitute, constantly reminded by Mal of her whoring ways.

None of these characters are ones I would want my daughters to consider role models. 

Zoe, Firefly/Serenity

Of the women in Joss' collection that I can truly consider strong, I would only be Zoe.

Black Widow? Not Joss' character.

Believe it or not, I don't hate him for this any more than I would hate him for his grim reaping. His manipulations mean I  get to see more women (and now people of colour) in his works. Hopefully, because of this, the less crafty directors and writers will be tricked into casting more women and people of colour in roles like these, but not as plot and media devices as they are with Joss.

What I dislike is the label that has been planted on him as if he was the first and is the only male writing good female characters. Men like Greg Rucka and Ridley Scott have been around for a while, and I can truly consider their characters "strong" and written without manipulating stereotypes.

One day, we won’t need 11 reasons to show how awesome a female character is in a film and how she holds her own alongside the boys. We won’t need scenes where directors use our prejudices to trick us (and poor Loki) into believing Black Widow is “just a woman,” to give her the opportunity to prove that she is, in fact, A Woman (and not a "mewling quim").

One day, we'll watch a movie or a TV show or read a book and not be amazed by the strength of its female characters. We'll just read or watch it and appreciate it. Because one day, that will just be completely normal.

I probably shouldn't drunk while blogged

My brother invited us to some soiree for the local YMCA of which he and my cousin are on the board. I assumed it would be some boring ass event that my husband and I would beg off after an hour. But there was a babysitter and an open bar and good food and reasonably good music so we indulged a bit.

A bit.

Apparently, I looked hot. My husband said so, and the camera guy seemed to keep finding excuses to have me in all the pictures. Okay not all. Shut up. The bartender kept free pouring my drinks, for which my husband happily tipped him and the cute waiter kept personally taking my order. And all the waiters kept bringing me horse d'ovres trays, but that might have had more to do with the fact that I squee'd and clapped when they brought me yummy stuff because. food. Is yummy.

There was some priest there and he said a prayer and during his prayer, I was thinking about Fenris headcanon that the Gods might not find appropriate (well Bacchus would probably be cool with it). I'm going to Orlais Hell.

There were some speeches and some pretty cool guys were honoured, including Dr. James E. West and Alrick Brown. It was really nice to see that all these rich people weren't all just there for a charity case. Many of them had strong ties to the YMCA.

And then there was music. It's been a while since I've cut loose on a dancefloor, even though the DJ's selection was disappointing. I tried my best to keep my requests above the underground (what do you mean you don't have the dirty garage mix of Spin Spin Sugar?) but he didn't even have the old school favourites like Groove is in the Heart. That's okay though. There was enough to keep me happy and OMG I'm in love with Charlie, the guy who brings fucking castanets to the party. My geekery continued with me busting out The Shepard and the Techno Turian. And there is nothing like getting plastered in front of my dad and then dancing with him to Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.  Oh daddy dear, you know you're still number one.

I can't wait to read this tomorrow.

I forgive you, Joss

I forgive you for Buffy S8 - well, mostly because you realized it was crap and apologized already. I forgive you for Dr. Horrible. Okay, it wasn't that bad, but I'm apparently one of the few people in the world who didn't absolutely love it. I forgive you for Angel S3 and 4 and what you did to Cordelia. Well, no, nevermind. That all really sucked. I forgive you for resurrecting Colossus despite Marvel actually promising never to do so, and thereby negating the meaningful death of yet another Marvel character. Well, I only forgive you because you made me love X-Men again because of it. I forgive you for being suckered by Fox again and giving us Dollhouse. Hm. No, that was just plain stupid, Joss. I forgive you for The Shepard's Tale. No. Wait. I will never ever forgive you for that.

I will even forgive you for your forever predictable need to kill beloved supporting characters in order to advance the plot and/or motivate their friends. Even this one is okay because Obama's taking care of it (spoiler).

The Avengers renews my faith in Joss Whedon, comic book movies and Hollywood. Joss had the advantage of the prequel movies here so he didn't need to dwell on character development too much, and yet, he made sure they were still very human and had their human moments and in fact, that's exactly what Loki played on.

Ah Loki. Allow me a moment here. Tom Hiddleston. You. Just. You. I will have your babies. Especially if you ask me nicely. All that Loki makes up for Chris Hemsworth not taking his shirt off.

Moving on. I'm in love with the entire cast. Even if this movie sucked, the comraderie continually displayed by these actors made it that much more appealing, even before seeing the film.

I can't be bothered to make this a proper, intellectual review (which should be obvious by now). There ought to be no reason for anyone not to see this movie and enjoy it, if not love it. For those who just want to hate, then go ahead and hate. Nothing I say is going to change your unbridled bitterness, so kindly move along while I squee.

Other notes:

• I spent the entire movie really wanting to brush Thor's hair.
• Anyone OTPing Stark and Rogers is stupid! Clearly it's all about science! But don't worry, Banner and Stark will let Pepper and the Cap watch. BTW, what did Stark do to Banner?
• No Joss is not a feminist because he made Black Widow more than just the T&A some idiots assumed her to be. Joss is, in fact, a brilliant writer who knows how to manipulate his audience.
• "Fangirling like a Coulson." That is now a thing.
• Hawkeye, honey, you're still no Legolas and your purpose was, well. Plot. Maria Hill still did more than you.
• How are people still stupid enough to get up before the credits are over?
• Special love for the woman in the audience with the super obnoxious laugh that was at first annoying, but then we found ourselves really disappointed when she didn't laugh at certain funny parts.

Trying to get through Dragon Age 2

It seems I am unable to review Dragon Age games without making comparisons to Mass Effect, so I might as well just roll with it. However, where I felt Dragon Age: Origins was better in some ways than Mass Effect, Dragon Age 2 is far, far worse than its Mass Effect equivalent. I had complained, after playing ME2, that the game felt very short; it felt like a filler meant to buy time until they figured out what came next. Still, ME2 featured a strong enough story on its own and some memorable, well-developed supporting characters. Not to mention the continued development of Shepard. While I was angry that the DLC for the game should have been part of it and not extra, these too added to an overall, well written story.

Dragon Age 2? I’m late to the party, so everyone else has already reported on the lolplot, game mechanics and zone reskins that confirm that this game was rushed. This game definitely feels like filler, but it is filled with, well, crap that makes it obvious that its real purpose is to cash in on the popularity of its predecessor by setting it in the same world and making vague connections to DAO. I direct a large part of my hatred to Act I, which involves hours of questing so that Hawke can earn money. Certainly, all games having a questing element that is usually carefully disguised to extend game play, build character reputation and make money. DA2 creatively disguised this process as “Do lots of quests to build your reputation and make money for 2 years.” The story ... well... far into Act II, I still have no idea what Hawke’s purpose is nor what the major conflict is to be.

No, that’s not true, I gathered that the mages versus the templars is to be a thing, but my brain is still trying to comprehend where the darkspawn have gone. You see, my DAO epilogue specifically said that, while the archdemon had been defeated, the darkspawn are still vast in number and continued to spread into the other realms. And then there’s that pesky Architect with his new breed of thinking, feeling darkspawn. So when DA2 starts with Hawke running from darkspawn and later meeting Grey Wardens heading off on a super secret mission, I kind of assume that darkspawn are still an issue.

Silly me.

Evidently, Bioware does not like to continue storylines involving the word “dark,” but at least the mysterious dark energy from ME was not a prominent enough plot point for it to be greatly missed when Bioware decided not to continue with Drew Karpshyn’s original story concepts. But Bioware has since confirmed that DA3 will have nothing to do with the Grey Warden character from DAO. There will be a new protagonist for us to play with.

Well, I suppose we have the Hero of Ferelden and the Champion of Kirkwall. It only makes sense to return to the thesaurus to give us the Conqueror of Orlais. I’m not happy about not being able to continue my hero or champion, save through DLC, but that’s my problem because Shepard has spoiled me. There’s really nothing wrong with Hawke and this new protagonist’s stories taking place in the same realm as the Grey Warden from DAO. But Bioware, don’t tell me that my decisions with these other characters matter if that simply means throwing in a vague reference here or placing a familiar character there. I’m not going to speculate on DA3 save to say that I am holding on to a tiny thread of hope that Bioware and EA now have an idea of what “artistic integrity” actually means and will give us a DA3 that I will want to spend my money on. At the moment, I’m glad my husband found DA2 in a clearance bin.

Truth is, I am about midway through Act II of DA2, writing this review. I have no clue where the game is going. I would like to hope that I will be pleasantly surprised when I finally get to Act III (which shouldn’t take long, according to my friend. See? Act I really was just about stretching out game play).

So why am I still playing? Indoctrination, perhaps. Possibly because, for the first time, I have delved into the magical world of PC game mods and am having a fun time making my characters look the way I want them to. Partially because I’m curious. I’ve come this far, why wouldn’t I finish? And because I haven’t slept with Anders and Fenris yet. I’m a sucker for Bioware’s companion characters and supporting cast. Not just for the sexy time value, but because they are usually very intriguing and unique and are what truly make these games for me. At least Bioware manages to get that part right every time.

Well. Except for Diana Allers.

Kaidan, why can't you be more like Alistair?

I’m almost finished my second play through of Dragon Age: Origins. I am tempted to play through again to fix some decisions, but since this game doesn’t allow direct replay like Mass Effect does, I really should just content myself with my current headcanon. Headcanon fixes everything.

 I had hoped to avoid making Mass Effect comparisons in this ‘review,’ but that is impossible. First and foremost, as much as I love Mass Effect and all it stands for, I have to say that DA:O does in a single game what Mass Effect stumbled and ultimately sort of failed to do in three. No, I’m not talking specifically and only about the dreaded endings, however, playing the lovingly labeled “climax” of DA:O made me sad for all the things that ME3 should have had (and did have, but cut) in its ending. DA:O is a solid story of the few against the horde, struggling to gather allies to defeat the Big Bad. Unlike ME3, there are many choices and they do matter in the end. But I won’t dwell.

 What truly inspired me to play ME was my friends’ talk of the supporting characters and the ability to interact with them. DA:O companions are 10x better. My husband had played it a bit before and I was amused listening to the characters’ comments, so learning from others just how much more colour the DA companions have, I couldn’t help but play and consequently fall in love. As great as the stories are, it’s really the companions that make these games for me and I am not ashamed to admit that I spent a good hour last night trying to deal with my NPC romances, while chatting with Digital Tempest who was busily doing the same in Dragon Age 2.

 Save the kingdom from the Blight? Yeah in a minute. Lemme just sleep with this cute bard first.

 Priorities!

"Maker's breath, but you're beautiful"

Obviously, a lot of effort went into these companions. Their stories, their feelings, their amusements. If that’s not your thing, then you can just ignore them and carry on with the Darkspawn slaying. The game doesn’t really punish you for not wanting to have meaningful relationships with the people fighting alongside you (assuming you don’t make an effort to make your companions hate you), but it does reward you for doing so. There are a lot of dialogue options with everyone and as many opportunities for friendships as there are for romance. I appreciate that balance, even though it is impossible for me to be “just friends” with Alistair. Try as I might, I am a hopeless romantic for his hopeless romanticism. When a man suddenly gives you flowers – in the middle of a whore house, after you’ve spent allll the funds on prostitutes, and have a threesome with a pirate queen – and confesses his love for you with lines like this....

 The other impressive part of this game is the replay value. The game differs enough if you side with different groups and choose different starting options to make it interesting once or twice more. I started as a mage, but wasn’t feeling her. I restarted as a Dalish rogue and instantly fell in love. What really impressed me was that, because Mardelle’s opening storyline differed so greatly from my mage, my views on many elements changed. I went from trying to sleep with Duncan to hating him for taking me away from my people.  

I am currently finishing up with my human noblewoman, Allaré, who did try to sleep with Duncan and has her eyes on the throne and on vengeance. The way your origins come into play is skillfully done, with touching, empowering and painful moments for all. Your decisions likewise strongly affect the outcome. You still ultimately have to face the same trials on the journey, culminating in the typical showdown, but your decisions can greatly alter the end result. The game is even kind enough to circle back to your earlier exploits, offering a simple text epilogue telling of how your decisions affected other aspects of the kingdom. Ah closure is such a sweet sweet thing. Okay I said I wouldn’t dwell on Mass Effect comparisons but ... no, never mind. <sigh>

 My only true complaint with this game, is no fault of its own, but of its masters and how they have spoiled me. I played Mass Effect and SWTOR before Dragon Age, which means I spent hours upon hours with voiced characters. As fun as it is to speak on behalf of Mardelle and Allaré, there is something to be said about having voice actors in the lead roles. Combined with the ability to create the character to look as you wish, the voice acting, when done well, really brings the characters to life and makes them feel, perhaps ironically, like my own.

And so, as I complete Dragon Age: Origins and start up Dragon Age 2 and download The Silent Grove and read all the books and watch for news of Dragon Age 3 and find all the fan art and write my headcanons, I come to terms with the fact that I have yet another new obsession.

Oh Bioware. The things you do to me.

Geekery in the office

I had one person wish me a May the 4th today, but otherwise I avoided the internet to avoid the spam. I do appreciate a little bit of office geekery, though. Hell, I'd appreciate a lot more of it. There was one guy who I chatted BSG with, but it's long over and we've moved on. My 4th wisher is a bit of a geek, but ... well she's not the kind of geek with whom I can flail  and discuss space magic and 'ship everything and talk about feels for pixelated characters and have them understand completely. I have those friends online, but I need them at work.

But then the new lady today won the priiiiize. She was talking to the other ladies, back in the accounting cubicles about being hot. There were the typical menopause jokes, but then she started talking about how the guys in the R2 and C3PO costumes got so hot that they would pass out so they had to add cooling devices to their costumes. She was hesitant at first, acting all coy, like she didn't know the name of the droids, but when they started laughing at the comparison, she started to roll with it and started talking about special effects and how Star Wars was still awesome even now and ... and... she started to lose them then, but I had to go by and give her a verbal high five for relating Star Wars to hot flashes.

And then it all reminded me of a co-worker at a former job. We were only together for a few months, but in that time, we giggled, fangirled, flailed and geeked a life time's worth.

Inside joke. Roy would understand.

Dynatherms connected!

My husband found video store Shangri la the other day and picked up the five volumes of Voltron DVDs for $8 each. He called to ask if I wanted the one with the 32 vehicles and I responded with a resounding “Fuck. That. Shit.”

 On a 2 hour trip to and from the grandparents’, the girls watched the first set in the car. I couldn’t watch, but I could hear. Oh the joy of listening to Optimus Prime deliver the blessed words of the opening. I listened contentedly to the cheesy dialogue, imagining the equally cheesy visuals as my girls sat in silent awe. When it came time to form Voltron, that big stupid grin spread across my face as I happily recited the words along with them and formed my blazing sword across the steering wheel.

 With these DVDs, and Teletoon Retro’s recent additions of Jem and the Holograms and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the nostalgia indoctrination of our kids is almost complete. They also recently discovered the X-Men from the '90s on Netflix. Moment of extreme pride when I asked Bunny if she wanted to watch Barbie and a Mermaid’s Tale again and she said, “No, I’d rather watch X-Men.”

Modesty and Willie: A Refreshingly Platonic Relationship

Originally posted by fyeahmodestyblaise:

Now here’s something I really like about the Modesty Blaise stories: Modesty and Willie are extremely close but their relationship is platonic. In fact they’re both of the firm opinion that having sex (with each other) would not benefit them at all. Although other characters are often curious, there’s no suggestion of “will they or won’t they?” in the books or the comics. I know some people like a bit of romantic tension but it’s ubiquitous in fiction and, personally, I find myself drifting away when shows such as Bones start focussing too much on the protagonists’ romantic relationship. It’s refreshing to see the portrayal of different kind of close relationship and one that doesn’t interfere with the overall story (or become the overall story). Instead we just have two people who are fiercely loyal to each other kicking bad-guy arse.

It was in Saigon that she first saw Willie Garvin — in Thai-style combat. Of lethal skills, he was gutter-bred with a mind clouded by unreasoning hatred. 

 A week later she bought him out of jail — without strings. To a dazed Willie Garvin she seemed a princess… and “Princess” he called her from that time on. Within six months a new Willie Garvin was born — a man of cheerful confidence, sharp intelligence, and all his old criminal skills… 

Soon he was Modesty’s right arm in running The Network. Both were unique, both originals. They learnt much from one another. Through six years Willie Garvin served ‘The Princess’. Together they schemed, fought, bled, tended each others hurts… and grew very rich. - In The Beginning, Peter O’Donnell